The Best Hot Fudge......Ever!

   Homemade Hot Fudge

10 Tbs. unsalted butter (NOT margarine)

1/2 c. unsweetened cocoa

4 squares unsweetened chocolate

1 1/2 c. sugar

2 tsp. vanilla

1 can evaporated milk

4 Tbs. light Karo syrup

Pinch of salt

Combine all ingredients EXCEPT vanilla in a saucepan. Cook over medium heat until sauce comes to a boil and boil for two minutes. Remove from heat and add vanilla. Let cool slightly, then serve over brownies, ice cream, etc.

*Sauce will thicken as it cools

Here's a tip: don't skimp on ingredients! The better the quality of your ingredients, the better your food will taste-it really does make a difference! You will get what you pay for. Buy the best that you can afford. Generic ingredients =generic taste.

This recipe makes quite a bit-it will probably serve six to eight people. 

For smaller quantities you can easily divide the recipe in half.

Let me know how you like it!

The Great Toffee Trials

  So, occasionally I like to challenge myself by learning to make new things. A couple of years ago I decided to learn how to make toffee. No big deal, right? I found a recipe, broke out the butter and the candy thermometer and got to work. Everything was going great-it smelled good, it was bubbling nicely and I was feeling smug. Another recipe conquered. Or so I thought. 
   I watched the candy thermometer closely, waiting for it to reach the magic temperature and for the candy to turn that beautiful shade of caramel. It never happened. Before I knew it, all of the moisture had boiled out of it and I was looking at a pan of what resembled wet sand. NOT toffee. I figured something must have gone wrong, so I tried again. And again, and again. Same result. Hmmm....
   I found a troubleshooting guide and tried their suggestion to "save" a batch of toffee gone awry.  Wet sand-again. This went on for several months. My pride would not let me quit. I told myself "I can make cheesecake. I can make a good pie. Not everyone can do that, so I should be able to make toffee. I've never failed like this at anything before." And still I failed.  A friend who is known for her perfect toffee came over one day to help. She watched me make the toffee-all by myself, and it turned out perfectly. I didn't do anything different than I did when I was alone. I have NO IDEA why it worked that time. She left and I decided to hurry up and make another batch while the success was still hanging in the air. Guess what happened? That's right-wet sand.
   I gave up. It stung my ego like nothing else had. I felt like a failure, and a loser. It was my secret shame.  The one thing I couldn't make. I resigned myself to it and tried to forget. I tried to make a joke of it and my husband was only too happy to help me make fun of myself. Every now and again he would say "Boy, I wish someone would make me some toffee". Ha ha.
I moved on-for more than a year.
   Then, one day I was visiting a doctor's office for work. I don't remember how it happened, but I found myself in a conversation with an elderly lady in the waiting area. We talked about cooking and I mentioned that I love to cook. She said she did too, and I asked what she liked to make. She said, "Oh, I like to make candy-you know, divinity, fudge, toffee..." So I told her my dirty little secret. I confessed how I had tried and tried to make toffee without success. She told me that she had a recipe that worked like a charm every time. It was an old English recipe that she had had for years and years, and she shared it with me. She also gave me her name and phone number so I could call her with questions and let her know if it worked for me. She promised it would.  
   I went home, and it was a week or so before I worked up the nerve to give it a try. Funny thing, her recipe was exactly like the one I had been using with one small exception-3 tablespoons of Karo syrup.  I knew in my heart that it wasn't going to work-how could it? She told me I didn't even need a candy thermometer. She said it would turn the "color of a brown paper bag" and that's how I would know it was done. Well, I tried that recipe and no one was more shocked-and proud-than I was when it actually WORKED! One perfect batch of toffee later, and I was optimistic enough to try it again. And it worked again. Wow.
   Needless to say, I no longer make toxic toffee. I have made it more than two dozen times and I don't need a recipe or a candy thermometer. It turns out perfectly every time. I'm so proud. And grateful. Isn't it funny? You just never know what kind of knowledge someone else has to share with you, or how a complete stranger might touch your life. Such a silly thing, really, but that cute little lady gave me back some of my self-confidence and I will be forever grateful. For that matter, so will my husband, because he gets all the toffee he wants these days.


**I found out the next time I went to that doctor's office that my toffee making friend (whose name is Geri, by the way) had worked at Startup's in Provo for years and years. For those of you who aren't from around here, that is a very well known, even semi-famous candy company in downtown Provo that was started by the Startup family in the 1870's and carried on by their children to the present day. Pretty amazing history, I think. http://www.startupcandy.com/CompleteHistory.html

Orange Coconut Macaroons

      So, a few weeks ago I had a party. Of course in MY world, you can't have a party without food so I made some cookies. My BFF is allergic to chocolate, so I wanted to make three or four different kinds-some with, some without.  One of them was a new recipe for Orange Coconut Macaroons that sounded yummy.  The recipe called for 4 1/2 oz. of almond paste, which I didn't have, and I was NOT going to the store for it at 9:00 at night. So, I decided to try and substitute almond extract-which I DID have.  As I often do, I skipped the measuring and just dumped what I thought was the right amount into the food processor and let it mix away. 

    

     I thought maybe it would be a good idea to take a sniff, see if it smelled like almond and thereby judge the effectiveness of my guess. I leaned over, took a BIG breath in through my nose....and almost choked! The smell of almond and alcohol burned the inside of my nose so badly that I had to take a step back and wait a second while I tried to catch my breath and recover. Then, what do you think I did next?  That's right-with my eyes still watering I took another big sniff......with the same result! Ha ha ha-what an idiot!

     I thought maybe I had ruined the cookies, but I baked them anyway and was pleasantly surprised when they turned out to be good. They were actually kind of a hit, so I thought I would share the recipe.

Here it is.......MY version!

Orange Coconut Macaroons 

3/4 C. granulated sugar        
1Tbs. finely grated orange zest            
1 tsp fresh orange juice    
2 large egg whites              
1/3 c. powdered sugar   
3 Tbs. flour
1 1/3c. packed coconut     
3/4 tsp. kosher salt
4 1/2 oz. almond paste OR an undetermined amount of almond extract (if you're feeling brave)

Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Blend sugar and orange zest in a food processor for @ 3 minutes. Add almond paste, process 1 minute. Add egg whites, orange juice, powdered sugar, flour, HALF the coconut and salt. Mix for 1 minute, then stir in remaining coconut. Drop by spoonfuls onto baking sheet lined with parchment. Bake @ 25 minutes until edges start to turn brown. Eat them if you dare!

Customize your own....

I have one chalkboard available that can be customized just for YOU! It is the same shape and just a couple of inches bigger than this one. It can be left "rustic" or painted and distressed in the color of your choice for only $35.00. Get it now before someone else does-you know you want it!

Chalkboards

      So I kind of have a thing for chalkboards right now. I don't know why, I just think they're kind of cool. Most of you have seen the chalkboard doors that I made for my pantry, and I recently purchased one for my dining room. I really wanted to make my own, but I also wanted it RIGHT NOW so I found one I liked and I bought it.  I thought it would be fun to post the dinner menu for parties, or write cool sayings on from time to time.

      However, this weekend I made a couple and I think they came out pretty well. One of them is already sold! I have a few more in the works, but none of them are picture worthy yet. They will be for sale at various prices, depending on the size and amount of work involved i.e. custom paint, distressing, adding hooks or other details. I think they will make great gifts for Mother's Day, birthdays-even wedding and housewarming gifts. They are perfect in any room-kitchens (for shopping or "to do" lists), dining rooms, kids rooms, even in the laundry room as a place to hang coats, etc. See what YOU think.......

In Pursuit of Perfection

     I recently had a little get-together at my house. Nothing fancy, just a few friends and acquaintances for some food and fun. If you ask me, it's a really good way to get things done around your house. Every time I do this it's the same story-I swear it's not going to happen, but it ALWAYS does. All of a sudden, the house that I love is full of flaws and I find myself with a to-do list a mile long. Seriously.
     Now, when I think back on times that I've been in someone else's house, I can't remember any kind of details-just general impressions. I have never taken a magnifying glass and looked for dirt or peeked under the bed for dust bunnies. I mean, who cares? It's all about the company, and the experience. But for some reason when people come to MY house, I panic over the smallest details. Why?
      I'm not entirely sure where I'm going with this-maybe it's some kind of therapy for me.  I don't think my friends are critical, and I know that most of them would never judge me if my house was cluttered, the food was bad or my throw pillows didn't match (ha ha). I really would love to just have a party and not spend days (or weeks) planning food, cleaning, stressing and touching up those mistakes in my decor. My one ray of hope is an article I read in a magazine that got me right where it counts and I've saved it for years, waiting to find a way to post it somewhere in my house and more importantly-imitate it.
      The story was about a woman very much like me, who for her own reasons, always spent her parties in a panic, frantically working in her kitchen while everyone had fun without her. Then, one night,  she was a guest at a dinner party that was unlike anything she had ever experienced. The food WAS NOT READY when the guests arrived.  The guests were asked to HELP with the chopping, mixing and tasting. The hostess was not even wearing lipstick. The drinks were served in an old milk jug. There was a dog sleeping under the table. And.....she had an absolutely fantastic time! In fact, I think she said it was the best dinner party she had ever attended.
      She said that she asked the hostess what her secret was- how she could be so relaxed and casual, and shared how she stressed over her own entertaining efforts. The hostess basically told her that her motto was to NEVER put your best foot forward when entertaining-don't try to impress people, and if they STILL like you then you can relax forever!
  Wow-probably not such a shocking concept to most of you, but for me it was a revelation. The idea that I could not try so hard to be perfect, that people could see my flaws and STILL like me is just out of reach. It makes sense in my head, but I can't quite get my heart to buy in. Some times I do better than others. My husband has learned what pushes my panic buttons and does his best to be helpful and supportive. He hates to see me that way-up all night, tired, critical of myself. But he has also learned that no one can really help me but me. I have no problem being laid back when someone else is throwing the party. I don't mind helping them cook, clean up, whatever. Why do we (because I KNOW I'm not alone in this) beat ourselves up in the quest to be the perfect hostess? Where do these insecurities come from? And why can't we see ourselves the way others see us?
      I think for me, it is the knowledge that I have no special talents. I can't sing, I'm not a genius, I don't dance, paint, play sports or piano, sew, or do anything else that makes me special. The cooking thing is all I have, and LOTS of people can do that. So, I try very hard to do my best and hope that it's enough to make me stand out in some small way. Someday, I hope to be that woman in the story-the one who was confident and casual at her parties. In the meantime, I will continue the battle with those inner demons who so badly want me to fail. Maybe I can whip them into submission with a clean kitchen and some perfectly baked New York Cheesecake.....







     

Which kind of person am I?

Last Friday started out kind of rough. I only had four hours of sleep the night before, and to add insult to injury I got soap in my eyes when I was taking a shower. When I left for work they were bloodshot and still stinging.  I also had a delivery to make- a rum cake ordered by a friend that I had made the night before. Twice.

It started out okay. I actually had to make two cakes- a Mocha Toffee cake for a friend's birthday, and the Rum cake. No big deal- I baked them, cooled them and got ready to take them out of the pans. The Mocha Toffee cake came out beautifully. I wrapped it up and then moved on to the Rum cake. When I
looked in the pan, my heart sank.....and so had the cake. In all my years of making these cakes I have NEVER had one not turn out. I was hopeful that it would be alright once I got it out, and I prepared to package it up for delivery. It was getting late, I was tired and I wanted to be done. I convinced myself that the cake would be fine-even though it didn't look quite right. I started to clean up. My husband had already gone to bed and I was hoping to do the same. I told myself that my friend would understand if the cake wasn't perfect. I would tell her that I wouldn't charge her for it and she would probably overlook the fact that it was kind of  sagging and soggy because it would most likely still taste good. It smelled good, anyway.

I really, really wanted to believe it-and I almost did. But the voice in my head would not let me. It told me that I would not be able to sleep well. I pictured my friend serving the cake to her guests and maybe being embarrassed that it wasn't something she could be proud of. I thought about how I would be letting her down and then the voice in my head asked the million dollar question: Am I the kind of person who can feel good about giving someone less than my best?  And the answer (unfortunately) of course, was NO! It would have been so easy to just go to bed and yet I knew that I couldn't live with myself if I did.

I should say here that the cake didn't actually look THAT bad. I doubt most people would have noticed anything amiss, but after making so many of them I knew that it wasn't quite right. If you expect people to trust you, if you promise something that is better than what they can get elsewhere, how can you hope to be successful if you don't live up to those expectations?

So, at midnight-I found myself washing a cake pan, and getting out the Kitchen Aid all over again. I made an entirely new cake from scratch and waited sleepily for it to finish baking. I went to bed at 1 a.m. and miraculously woke up without an alarm two hours later to take the cooled cake out of the pan and wrap it up. Fortunately, this time it turned out perfectly. This was a huge relief but it was also a mystery- I swear I made both cakes EXACTLY the same. Oh well.

Fast forward back to Friday morning, the burning eyes and the sleepy fog in which I spent the first few hours of my day. It was all worthwhile though, when I delivered the beautiful, non-soggy looking cake safely to my friend as promised. Will she ever know the truth? I doubt it. Will it redeem all of the other horrible mistakes I make in my life every day just because I did the right thing one late February night? No way. But at least I made the right choice this one time- I was the kind of person who chose to do the hard thing instead of taking the easy way out and that gives me hope that I will do it again.